Plenty of 20-somethings sponge off their parents, but one 21-year-old Japanese parasite refuses to sponge herself off and is attracting a gaggle of male admirers on Japanese Internet forum 2channel.
Men are falling over themselves to get a crack at the virgin woman, who refers to herself as “21-Year-Old Shut-in” in posts. She is unemployed and does not bathe or leave her parents’ house. Several withered, rotten plants adorn her bedroom. One would think her life has completely fallen apart, but her posts are positive and she seems to be enjoying herself.
21-Year-Old Shut-in started a thread titled, “Any questions for a woman who hasn’t bathed in a week?” and posts came pouring in. She humors her followers, posting pictures of her bedroom and of herself eating and wearing different clothing upon request. Her fans certainly enjoy her smile and can take comfort in the notion that she is likely not some dude posing as a reeking recluse.
One amusing exchange went like so:
Fan: Height, weight, BWH, hair color and style?
21YOS: 5-4, 110. I don’t know my measurements. Long black hair, no particular style in the back.
Fan: Why do you think showering is such a pain?
21YOS: It takes 50 minutes to bathe. That’s real inconvenient.
Fan: If my daughter were an unemployed parasite, I’d beat her within an inch of her life.
21YOS: Hey, I had a job until May.
Fan: What are your interests?
21YOS: I don’t have any. I tried raising fish, but they died, so I lost interest.
Fan: Tell me how your feet smell right now.
21YOS: My feet don’t smell. My scalp smells oily, but I kinda like that smell.
Fan: (in response to a picture of a bento box) Whoa, did you go out shopping without showering?
21YOS: I don’t go out. My parents bought [the bento] for me. For your information, I’ll shower if I’m going to leave the house. Also, I’m a virgin.
Fan: You were popular with guys, why are you still a virgin?
21YOS: I feel like guys were just trying to get into my pants, and they didn’t seem to care if I pointed it out to them, so I turned them all down, and here I am still a virgin.
Fan: Show me a picture of you in street clothes.
21YOS: I wear T-shirts and jeans. I used to dress up in high school, but I thought it was kinda pointless, so I stopped doing that.
Fan: One time, I was on a crowded train, and a high school girl smelling of garbage was in front of me…
21YOS: I went three days without bathing one winter while I was working at a sweets shop. A Chinese person caught a whiff of my hair and said, “Damn, her head smell so baaad!”
Fan: Did something cause you to quit your job? Or did you just suddenly lose interest?
21YOS: Yeah, I got kinda tired.
Several of 21-Year-Old Shut-in’s fans have come forward with offers to date her and marry her despite her unique hygienic habits. Chalk up another assist for the Internet!