In this age of global travel and internet communication, meeting and even getting seriously involved with someone from outside your country is a very real possibility. For that matter, how do Japanese women and men rate as romantic interests? Takako Matsushita, a Japanese cabin attendant who has also appeared on T.V. and in magazines, offers her perspective on how Japanese women may get higher marks than Japanese men in the international dating market. And her message? Japanese men need to watch out, or all the nice ladies in Japan may be snatched up by foreign men!
In a commentary published on the website zakzak, Matsushita writes that Japanese women ranked as one of the most popular in the world, while Japanese men have ranked very close to the bottom in popularity. This has apparently been mentioned in articles in foreign magazines and on Japanese T.V. and also seems to be true among her acquaintances as well. She goes on to explain why she thinks this may be.
One factor she feels that contributes to the popularity of Japanese women is that they tend to be dainty in appearance and are very fashion conscious. Even the average Japanese girl is likely to look stylish by global standards or at least cute in their own way.
Another important factor is that Japanese women are used to going out of their way to be helpful and pleasant to men. (Although Japanese men may not entirely agree) Japanese women in general treat their men with a great deal of consideration, for example when serving food or drinks at social gatherings or even at the office, where Japanese women are often expected to serve coffee or tea to male colleagues. Thus, things that come as second nature to Japanese women may seem very considerate and helpful to men from other countries.
Matsushita admits sometimes this can go too far when interacting with foreign friends or colleagues, as was the case when she was dining with some crew members and after pouring drinks for male pilots, she ended up being warned by other attendants that this wasn’t appropriate behavior unless you were the man’s wife or you were in a profession that provided a “different” kind of service all together. Still, the fact remains that Japanese women do have a standard of “womanly” behavior they are expected to adhere to, which could well make them attractive to foreign men.
Now, whether this is sexist or not in the context of Japanese society is a different matter, and one that probably can’t be fully discussed in a single article. (To me, it seems women in Japan are in some ways allowed a great deal of social freedom and personal choice compared to many countries in the world, but at the same time there exist some very strong preconceptions about how women should or shouldn’t behave, all of which is just a part of life in Japan.)
On the flip side, what does this mean for Japanese men? Matsushita says that Japanese men are used to being treated well by Japanese women, spoiled in a way, and simply unaccustomed to doing certain things for women. This could very well make them unpopular with foreign women.
So, based on Matsushita’s reasoning, you could say that to foreign men, Japanese women can seem particularly kind and attentive by just doing what would normally be expected of them, and to Japanese women, foreign men can seem extra considerate by simply treating women the way they usually do.
Matsushita warns this could be bad news for all the Japanese guys out there — all the attractive Japanese ladies may want to look elsewhere for boyfriend/husband material. (Maybe Japanese men can take a hint from our past article on how foreign guys make Japanese girls fall head over heels.)
So there you have a Japanese cabin attendant’s take on the popularity of Japanese men and women. You may or may not agree, but I think it does give us some interesting points to consider. Well, no one ever said relationships were easy, and when it comes to the search for true love, we need all the good advice and luck we can get, don’t we?