Take a moment to examine this picture, a typical day at a typical stationery store with customers shopping for papers.  This is a sight anyone living in Japan has probably seen countless times before.

However, this girl has a secret so bizarre that – although it’s hard to say definitively –I’m inclined to declare photoshop shenanigans.  So come along if you dare. We’re about to take a trip into the Weird People Found on Twitter Zone.

For the sake of the people who were directly linked to this article I’m going to stretch the page out by writing out the lyrics to the theme song of the smash hit sitcom The Jefferson’s.

So feel free to take a moment and reflect on George and Wheezie before getting intensely weirded out.

Well we’re movin on up, To the east side.
To a deluxe apartment in the sky.
Movin on up
To the east side.
We finally got a piece of the pie.
Fish don’t fry in the kitchen;
Beans don’t burn on the grill.
Took a whole lotta tryin’
Just to get up that hill.
Now we’re up in the big leagues
Gettin’ our turn at bat.
As long as we live, it’s you and me baby
There ain’t nothin wrong with that.
Well we’re movin on up,
To the east side.
To a deluxe apartment in the sky.
Movin on up
To the east side.
We finally got a piece of the pie.

OK, Now back to the show.

Gah!

Now, there are a few things to point out in this image. First, those other guys are standing way too close and seem completely oblivious to the sixty-something male schoolgirl standing between them. Moving along, this dude’s legs and arm look amazingly like those of a young girl. He must bathe in skin lotion every day.

Most damning of all, however is if we examine the head.

“Computer, please zoom in on sector 7-G. Do do do.”

This light patch seems highly suspicious.  It looks as though someone tried to fill in a spot using the color of the wall. If that really is the wall then his neck seems to bend at a really odd angle.

On the other hand, his wispy grey hair in the back is very detailed and according to the shine on his forehead the lighting seems to match.

Also guys like this aren’t really that rare. When I was in university there was a guy with greasy grey hair and beard who would walk around the block several times a day in stilettos and a leather mini-skirt.

After a while he just sort of blended into the scenery which could explain why those other guys aren’t reacting in the photo.

Overall I’m leaning towards fake, but not yet fully convinced.  Until he’s confirmed to exist, it looks like Cornman is still the weirdest Japanese guy caught on Twitter.

Source: Twitter via Byokan Sunday (Japanese)
Update Photo: Bleu Bonbon (French)

**UPDATE**

Shortly after publishing the story nos amis français shed light on another less candid photo of the old man schoolgirl pretty much confirming his reality.  Now the question remains, who is the weirder dude walking the streets; this guy or Cornman?