Just when you thought it was safe to ask someone to touch up your photo, China’s Photoshop-proficient wags are back to corrupt people’s innocent image processing wishes.

In case, you missed Part 1 or even Part 2 of the series, the process involves someone asking for their photo to be improved, only to have the meaning of their words intentionally twisted for the sake of (our) humor. For example, the lady above was hoping she could look “sexier” through doctoring. Alas, she soon found that sexiness is in the eye of the beholder, or rather the person doing the ‘shopping.

Now that we’re all up to speed, on with the show.

▼ Request: “I wanna look awesome with lots of muscles!”
2013-05-19_014626

“It was hard to fit in the tensor fasciae latae but I think we got all of them.”

▼ Request: “I want this picture to have more impact.”
2013-05-19_020316 “I remember the first time I met a pro-footballer. It changed my life.”
2013-05-19_020330

▼ Request: “Make me sexier, please!”
2013-05-19_014522

Request: “I want a little more determination in this pic.”
2013-05-19_014426

“AH, REF! She’s using the freaking rope for Crissakes!! Fight dirty Red Rooster!”
2013-05-19_014442

Request: “I’m starting a new job as a teacher and I want to look more experienced.”
2013-05-19_014353

“There, you look 50 shades more worldly.”
2013-05-19_014409

Request: “I look badass but this background sucks! Cover it up, will ya? It’s embarrassing to show to girls.”
2013-05-19_020419

“That’s hardcore, right there.”
2013-05-19_020435

Request: “I wanna look more like a hero. Maybe put a lady in there?”
2013-05-19_015624

“There’s the lady. But don’t get carried away; you look plenty like a hero already.”
2013-05-19_015646

Request: “Make me look cool. I wanna put this on a dating website.”

2013-05-19_014110

“I used to know this chick who loved these kinds of guys. If she’s on that site, you’re golden.”
2013-05-19_014156

Request: “I want to look like I’m really driving this.”
2013-05-19_014226

“Vrrrrroooooommm!!!”
2013-05-19_014245
Request: “Dear artisans, please make this background more powerful.”
2013-05-19_014320

“I hear only superman is more powerful than that… or was it faster? I dunno…”
2013-05-19_014335

 Request: “Make me look like a spirit or ghost. Like from A Chinese Ghost Story.”
2013-05-19_024755

“Been a while since I saw that one, but I remember it scared the crap outta me.”

2013-05-19_024812

We saw this one in Part 1 asking for “more excitement.”
2013-05-19_014731

Someone upped the ante.
2013-05-19_014745

Request: “Please give this a fantasy feel.”
2013-05-19_014824

▼ “It was the first one that came to mind.”
2013-05-19_014841

Request: “We wanna look tougher.”
2013-05-19_014929

“Really? Tougher than you already are? Well, alright…”
2013-05-19_014944

Request: “Can you give me longer hair? Don’t change anything else on me.”
2013-05-19_015007

“We left your face completely intact.”
2013-05-19_015025

Request: “Whatever you do, make me the man in this photo.”
2013-05-19_015220

“You da man!”
2013-05-19_015235

Request: “Don’t screw around, okay? Make me like a gangster or celebrity in this photo.”
2013-05-19_015305

“Lindsay Lohan last seen exiting arraignment.”
2013-05-19_015319

Request: “This photo is crap, what can you guys do with it?”
2013-05-19_020028
“Erm, this?”
2013-05-19_020042

Request: “Alright you trolls, hit me with your best shot!”
2013-05-19_015415

Request: “Can you put a chick by my arm? She doesn’t have to be hot.”
2013-05-19_015432

“She’s a fixer-upper.”
2013-05-19_015447

Request: “My buddy’s having a birthday party. Can you make this a good invitation?”

2013-05-19_015503

“I remember this working for a party a while back. Hope you like the proletariat.”
2013-05-19_015516Caption: “United we will continue to win greater victories”

Request: “Please change the background, my room is too dirty.”
2013-05-19_015707

“One man’s trash…”
2013-05-19_015727Caption: “University Student’s Brilliant Venture; Turns Trash Heap into Gold”

Request: “There’s a nice big space for you to put in a sick car, like the kind celebrities use.”
2013-05-19_015834

“The Jolie/Pitts swear by these cars. Especially when the lil’ ones are sick.”
2013-05-19_015854

Request: “Make my dreams come true!”
2013-05-19_020242

“Keep practicing and someday this will be a reality!”
2013-05-19_020257Caption: 2012 Photoshop Dumbass Kid Dance Competition

[ Read in Japanese ]