Excuses are like anuses; everyone’s got one. That’s the reasoning behind the Edible Anus line of chocolates created in England. These handcrafted chocolates represent something that transcends cultural boundaries to offer creamy sphincter shaped goodness to the whole world, even reaching Japan where netizens have been left open-mouthed at the idea of munching on a chocolatey orifice.
Edible Anuses are available in three flavors; Dark Chocolate, Milk Chocolate, and White Chocolate. Pardon me while I just check that this isn’t a dream and I just actually wrote that last sentence. Okay, on to business. The sweets are hand made with all natural ingredients and are completely free of artificial preservatives, ensuring the freshest and cleanest anuses around.
The makers would like to warn you, however, and these anuses may have been around nuts. Those with allergies might want to steer clear. I swear we’re not making this up.
As the existence of this product reached Japanese shores, many netizens came out to comment. Some were against the notion of anus chocolates with some even commenting that Britain had lost the plot, saying, “British people have no sense, this is freakish and in bad taste.”
However, the big question on commenters’ minds was who the anus belonged to. According to the Edible Anus website these chocolates were “lovingly crafted from the delectable posterior of our stunning butt model”. Beyond that, the lord of this ring is uncertain.
Still, many commenters in Japan seemed intent on knowing whose butthole this was. One recommended, “If you put a picture of the person on the box these could sell like crazy!” Another said that “if these belonged to AKB48 it would be a guaranteed hit.”
However, the message of Edible Anus isn’t who the anus belongs to. The idea is that the anus is universal, and regardless of our sexuality, race, or religion the one things that unites us as humans is we’re all at our cores, just a bunch of a buttholes.
… Then again, we all have thumbs too…
▼ Five boxes of three chocolates would cost US$45.50 including shipping to Japan
▼ You can also show everyone your love of fine chocolates with Anus merchandise!
▼ Chocolate anuses are fleeting, silver anuses are forever and for 260 pounds (US$400)
[ Read in Japanese ]