RocketNews24 reporter extraordinaire Kuzo was feeling a little at half-mast recently and was looking for some ways to put some lead in his pencil, and fast.

Luckily he heard about some Taiwanese dishes that promise to boost stamina and went out in search of them. What he found was some snake, softshell turtle, and Asian ginseng soups. Par for the course for our gourmet reporter but these soups were also served with the bodily fluids of the animals such as blood and poison. If that doesn’t get Kuzo up and going we don’t know what will.

First he tried the snake combo which came with a bowl of snake soup, cup of snake blood, and a shot of snake venom (diluted). The soup itself had a lightly pleasant taste, and was the kind of soup that you could easily eat on a daily basis. On the other hand, the blood was kind of gross and tasted like iron.

Then came the Chinese softshell turtle platter! It was pretty similar to the snake combo, only it seemed as if it was straight out of a microwave which Kuzo didn’t seem to mind (he loves Domino’s after all). It surprisingly tasted even milder than the snake soup meaning you could really pound it down for some quick stamina if needed. The turtle skin was squishy and collageny, and traditional or not our reporter felt a pang of guilt eating something so cute.

Finally it was time for the Asian ginseng soup. Luckily since ginseng doesn’t bleed or have poisonous bites this soup was served by itself. It had a medicinal taste to it, our reporter commented, and isn’t a flavor you’re likely to see getting its own Happy Meal any time soon. However, you could get the sense that this soup would really help get you up and going.

  Kuzo’s Conclusion
“I can’t say I felt anything out of the ordinary stirring within my body. I feel pretty normal. This is pretty much how I feel after eating McDonald’s. I guess maybe you’d have to eat this kind of stuff everyday to get the effects that people talk about? [yawns]”

Original Story by Kuzo
Photos: RocketNews24

Snake Meal

Chinese Softshell Turtle Meal

Asian Ginseng Meal


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