Cats often get a bad rep for being lazy and selfish, but in fact they can back it up with a stellar job performance when necessary. For example, I once saw a cat swat and eat a cockroach in mid-flight. According to various industry insiders, employers hate cockroaches. Now that’s a valuable skill to add to any organization!
This is a fact of life that no one knows better than Russia. Their State Hermitage Museum is staffed by a team of cats who protect its treasures from vermin around the clock – or the sections of the clock they’re awake.
Even on the local level we now have Kuzya the tabby who is swiftly making his way up the ladder at a Novorossiysk Library. Coming straight off the streets he has already assumed the role of assistant librarian, and many are tipping him to be running the whole facility before long.
Kuzya showed up at the library’s door one day and impressed staff with his uncanny ability to look cute and fluffy. After arching his back and running his face along people’s legs he was able to procure food and (secretly) a warm place to spend cold winter days.
Unfortunately, Kuzya lacked the proper documents to be kept in a public space such as a library, so the staff, seeing the cat’s potential, worked to acquire it. Kuzya would need a cat passport, which apparently does exist. To get it he had an ID chip embedded along with a rabies vaccination.
With the paperwork in order, Kuzya could now openly roam the aisles of the library. Under his new title of “pet” he worked hard licking himself, looking cute, and taking naps so much that the library saw a significant increase in patronage. It turned out that people would come for the cat but stay for the book lending service.
Due to his success, the library promoted Kuzya from “pet” to “assistant librarian”. Perks included a raise in salary to 30 packs of cat food a month, bonuses of cat treats from staff and visitors, and a spiffy bow tie.
The promotion was officially documented and signed by the library’s administration.
We’re not quite sure this feline’s skyrocket in the public book lending sectors is through yet. He’s probably purring extra hard for the board of directors hoping to clinch a full librarian position as you read this.
Meanwhile thousands are learning from Kuzya’s secret to success and only working about five minutes a day but looking darn cute the rest of the time: a formula that practically made Hollywood what it is today.
▼ A Russian news report on Kuzya.