There must be something in the water…or maybe in the atmosphere? Well, whatever it is, the ranks of the “Real Barbie” army seem to only be growing faster! All across the world, new recruits keep appearing, one after another, in the most…peculiar of forms.
Our most recent example hails from China and has garnered quite a bit of attention in her native country–and has gotten noticed in Japan as well. But what will her role be in the Real Barbie plans for world conquest?
Though a bit mysterious–not much is known about her beyond that she seems to be a student at Australia’s Adelaide University, her name is apparently Yun Tang, and she’s about 19 years old–the young woman has plenty of followers and admirers in China. And although many of the Real Barbies of the world have gone out of their way to be more, uh, Barbierific, this Chinese Barbie seems to achieve the title with relative ease, though it’s hard to tell tell how much touching up has been done to her photos…
▼Gasp! I don’t think she actually sparkles in real life! Such treachery!
While this Chinese woman certainly has the cute, big-eyed look down, we couldn’t find any mention of Yun specifically aiming to be the living embodiment of a plastic doll. On the other hand, both Chinese and Japanese websites have given her the label, and we know better than to argue with the Internet! So, now we’re wondering…what are the benefits of joining the Real Barbie Army? Do you think they have a good dental plan? What is the retirement package like? And how do they feel about the Cabbage Patch Kids? See, these are the kinds of important questions that the mainstream media refuses to answer!
▼They’re clearly saving a bundle on uniforms…
Well, we suppose it’s too late to fight them now. They’re too powerful! The best we can do is just sit back, enjoy the photos, and welcome our new plastic overlords. Unless there are some Real G.I. Joes out there waiting to rescue us…
▼”Hmmm…how shall we try to take over the world tonight?”
▼Yun has just hit upon a great idea for conquering the US: Putting poison in the bacon!
▼Here, Yun demonstrates her willingness to crush her enemies with joy.
▼See, next they’ll be killing us with kindness! We can’t win!
▼”V” for “victory over humanity!”