Talk about dirty money.
No one ever said being a cop was easy, but this recent news story from India proves just how difficult (and gross) it can get…
A 25-year-old man was arrested for stealing a gold chain from a woman in the street, but he denied any wrongdoing. Police searched for the stolen necklace to use as evidence against him, but nothing turned up until they checked the least likely of places: the man’s stomach.
▼ “I swear I don’t know how that got there.”
An x-ray revealed that the man had swallowed the necklace in an effort to try to hide his crime. A variety of methods were suggested to get the necklace back: an enema that was attempted and failed, surgery, which was deemed too expensive, and others.
But it was the last suggestion that everybody seemed to get on board with: feeding the man bananas until he pooped out the stolen necklace.
▼ “You learn about the ‘Banana Method’ during police training, but nothing can prepare you for the real thing.”
According to Mumbai police senior inspector Shankar Dhanavade, the man was force-fed 40 bananas throughout the day, until the necklace finally, well, made an appearance. The police had the man wash and disinfect the necklace, and now it is most likely being used as evidence in his ongoing trial. We have to imagine it’s going to be hard for the man to make an argument against his guilt, considering the stolen goods literally came out from inside of him.
While some may question the police force’s use of bananas to retrieve the necklace rather than, say, laxatives, this case is not without precedent. Last July, a suspect was fed two dozen bananas and laxative-laced milk to retrieve a similarly swallowed gold chain, and a few months ago another suspect was force-fed five dozen bananas when he “hid” a gold chain and pendant by swallowing it.
There’s a very important lesson to learn from this story: “crime doesn’t pay-tassium.” Or was it “always know your right to ap-peel?” Well, either way, I think we can all agree justice was ripe-fully served.