Because they can’t take their hamster balls with them when they go, these cute pets seem to have accepted a higher power.
Being born with good looks can set one on a different path in life than other, less visually captivating individuals. Sometimes this blessing can be a positive, instilling confidence and fostering an outgoing, communicative personality.
On the other extreme, though, the knowledge that so many people enjoy looking at you can lead to arrogance or even a sense of entitlement. Before long, you’re flooding social media with photos of yourself lounging in the luxurious trappings of your extravagant lifestyle, letting the whole world know that yes, you are one of the beautiful people…or beautiful hamsters, as we saw earlier this month in case of the case of the cute little pet with his own Nissan GT-R sports car.
Actually, hamsters seem to be particularly susceptible to the allures of pleasures of the flesh. Aside from high-performance rides, we’ve seen them indulging in drink, reveling in the attention their shapely backsides earn them, and showing no restraint when it comes to getting inside people’s clothes. But now Japan has a guiding light to show these pets the way out of the sinful lifestyles that have sullied their souls.
ハムスター教の教祖 ｢我を崇めたまぇ～｣ https://t.co/zTQUoV5fOC—
すーたろう@ハム垢 (@suu0319) July 02, 2016
Japanese Twitter user and hamster owner @suu0319 shared this photo of, in his words, “The founder of Hamsteranity.” And while the leader of the new faith is issuing the command “Worship me,” to his parish, the religion seems to eschew the opulence that’s corrupted so many hamsters in this modern era. The congregation gathers at a humble plastic-roofed prayer hall, with some wood shavings and newspaper the only creature comforts they need.
As with many spiritual movements, the tenets of Hamsteranity are no doubt a work in progress, but hopefully we’ll soon have an answer soon as to whether practitioners need to say grace when inserting food into their cheek pouches, or if it’s OK to wait until they actually plan to eat it before offering thanks.
Follow Casey on Twitter, where he’s wondering if Hamsteranity churches keep their holy water in those cage-mounted sipper bottles.