Japanese commenters react to the news that eating healthy makes you smell better.
According to an article in Evolution and Human Behavior, sweat produced by males who ate a balanced diet consisting of fruits, vegetables, fats, meat, eggs and tofu was judged by females to be more pleasant smelling than the sweat of males who ate a higher concentration of carbohydrates. The better smelling sweat was recorded to have more “floral, fruity, sweet and medicinal qualities” to it.
Sweat and attractiveness may not go hand-in-hand in most people’s minds, but if you’re a guy who’s been having bad luck with the ladies, then you might want to consider this: women typically have a more sensitive sense of smell than men, and women typically rate their partner’s smell as a more important factor in attractiveness than men.
So even if you don’t care that you smell like a used diaper on hot days or when you’re exercising, chances are those last couple hundred women who turned you down do care very much.
This news correlating diet and sweat-smell came as a shock to Japanese commenters. They had a lot of questions right off the bat:
“Do the vegetables in my ramen count?”
“Does drinking vegetable juice every day count?”
“Do potato salad and macaroni salad count as salad?”
▼ …good luck with that, guys.
Adam Carter (@theadamcarter) June 29, 2016
“Awesome! I eat fried vegetable senbei all the time!”
▼ You might want to check the nutrition label on those things, friend.
Matthew MacAulay (@MatMacAulay) August 25, 2016
“This goes for friends too. I’m a guy and I don’t ever want to hang out with smelly dudes.”
“Is this why women wear perfume? To cover up the horrible smell of their carbohydrate sweat?”
This study may be revealing social secrets that have been hidden for centuries….
“I guess I could try and put a piece of cabbage on my yakinuku….”
“Listen, I can eat vegetables all day but it’s not gonna stop me from reeking of beer, cigarettes and coffee.”
While a few will remain hopeless, if the study helps some people change for the better, then I call that a success. There’s nothing un-manly about eating a carrot with your mountain of meat!
“Wait so all this time I just had to eat salad and women would look past all my other horrible qualities? Awesome!”
Matriarch Athena (@MatriarchAthena) March 27, 2016
Of course it’s important to bear in mind that once you do achieve the adonis level of sweet-smelling sweat, it’s important to still be open to the signals that women give off when they’re interested. Otherwise you’ll still be alone… but at least you’ll have a nice-smelling laundry basket to show for it!