Harry Potter and the F****ing Pigeons – Chinese bootleg’s subtitles are full of melons 【Pics】

I have to admit, I’ve always been a little confused about what’s going on in the Harry Potter movies series. Does Hogwarts exist in another dimension, or is it just located in a part of the English countryside so isolated that no one notices the packs of monsters roaming the forest and flying through the skies? Why does the debate about whether or not “Voldemort is back” continue for years after he’s first seen? And why are all these super-powered wizards too lily-livered to say the dude’s name?

But perhaps my biggest question is this: What’s the deal with all the melons?

Wait, you don’t know about the melons? Or about Harry’s middle management struggles as he climbs the corporate ladder? Then read on for all of these plot elements added to the beloved franchise by Chinese bootleg subtitles.

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Young girl “hypnotizes” animals on Chinese TV show, we’re not entirely convinced 【Video】

A girl who recently appeared on Chinese variety show “Challenge the Impossible” (挑战不可能) demonstrated her ability to put a number of animals into a hypnotic state in front of a panel of hosts and a live studio audience.

During the segment, she performs her talent on a dog, a lizard, a frog, a chicken, and a rabbit. While it’s certainly adorable to see her in action, we’re not entirely convinced that she has a unique ability, especially in light of what happens in the middle of her demonstration.

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New Kyary Pamyu Pamyu video “Crazy Party Night” makes Halloween cute and colorful…in August

Kyary Pamyu Pamyu is know for many things, but subtlety certainly is not one of them. The singer/model/crazy-in-a-cute-way-girl has released so many bizarre videos by now that we suspect the Oxford English Dictionary will eventually include a picture of her grinning face under the entry for “quirky.” And that’s why we love her!

So we were naturally excited when we saw that she released a new video titled “Crazy Party Night: Pumpkins Strike Back” today. The music was exactly as peppy and cute as you might expect, and the video was…well, it was definitely a Kyary Pamyu Pamyu video. Check it out after the jump!

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NINGEN ISU: This Japanese literary metal band will rock your butt off【Photos & Video】

When Mr. Sato asks you if you want to check out a band with him, you say yes. You don’t ask which band or check your schedule, you just say yes, because you know it’s going to be a good night. It also doesn’t hurt that I already knew he was talking about NINGEN ISU, whose name literally means “Human Chair,” a metal band in the vein of all our favorite old-school traditional metal heroes.

NINGEN ISU’s rise in popularity has been on a slow but powerful burn for decades, and with their upcoming performance at OzzFest this year, they are sure to be popping up on a quite a few radars. So check them out here now and get ready to tell your friends that you knew about these guys way back when!

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Time to ham it up at this chain of Japanese wine bars with all-you-can-eat prosciutto for 500 yen

Freshness Burger is a well-known fast food burger chain in Japan. A lesser-known fact would be that they’ve gone a little gourmet and also have a chain of cheap tapas-like wine bars called FreBar, which offers arguably even better value than Freshness Burger.

For just 500 yen (US$4) you can have as much cured ham (prosciutto) as you like in an hour courtesy of their current promotion, called nama hamu tabehodai in Japanese. Mr Sato, RocketNews24 Japan writer and food adventurer, couldn’t pass up this offer, but just how many plates could he get through?

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Turn minor cuts and scrapes into fashion statements with these cute Japanese bandage designs

They say being prepared is half the battle, so it’s always a good idea to keep a first aid kit stocked up with adhesives or carry around a few bandages in your purse (or manbag for our fashionable male readers) in case of unexpected accidents. After all, even though that one lifehack said it was okay to use the inside membrane of a boiled egg when you’re in a pinch, we can’t say the idea is very appealing.

Luckily we’ve found the perfect set of bandages to do the trick, and we’re certain you’ll be stuck on them just as much as we are. With gorgeous images of sushi, ninjas, and other traditional Japanese designs, they’ll turn minor injuries turn into badges of original style.

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8-Bit Cinema’s Princess Mononoke remakes the Ghibli classic with classic video game art 【Video】

With director Hayao Miyazaki having retired from theatrical features, and the distinct possibility of the animation house he cofounded doing the same, anime fans looking for straight-from-the-source Ghibli magic are left with no choice but to rewatch the studio’s previous works. But with all the passion that Studio Ghibli puts into its movies, revisiting an old favorite is likely to put you in the artistic mood yourself, which is why a pair of admirers have made a condensed retelling of Princess Mononoke with old-school video game-style pixel art.

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Brave, pint-sized warrior almost loses his epic battle with a board

A while back, we introduced you to an adorably terrifying seven year-old karate sensation called Mahiro-chan, who appeared ready to more or less destroy the entire earth with her amazingly quick fists.

Well, if Mahiro-chan is the embodiment of cold, destructive toddler efficiency, this little tot is, uh…kind of maybe the opposite of that. Let’s watch as he valiantly takes on this incredibly thin sheet of balsa wood and almost loses.

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Cosplay of Howl’s actual castle moves us in mysterious ways【Photos】

The world of cosplay is a unique and creative place where people painstakingly create costumes that are as good as or sometimes better than the characters they are emulating. It’s a long and tiresome road to style hair, clothes, and makeup, but the complete costume is always something to be admired.

The inspiration behind a costume usually happens when someone sees a cool character or costume on a character that they want to recreate. However, that’s the thing, you usually see characters cosplayed, you don’t see too many buildings or inanimate objects running around at conventions. One famous castle is so lifelike though, it actually makes for a fantastic costume. Of course we’re talking about the “moving castle” from Howl’s Moving Castle and it looks just like it leaped right off the screen.

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Her cosplay power is over 9000! Japan mesmerized by American cosplayer Megan Coffrey【Photos】

After all of the amazing cosplay we saw at the recent Comiket 88 event in Tokyo, it’s easy to forget that there are some great cosplayers on the other side of the world too, much closer to home for many of us.

And one such cosplayer who has been getting a lot of Japanese attention recently is Megan Coffey from the U.S. She has been praised for not only her startlingly accurate depictions of numerous female characters, but her creative portrayal of a certain male Saiyan as well.

Does she give one of your favorite characters a 3-D makeover? Read on to find out!

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Presenting edible cuteness from the sea — it’s cat-shaped seaweed!

What comes to your mind when you hear the word seaweed? Some of you may think of the black sheet of nori used to wrap sushi rolls and onigiri rice balls. But that’s seaweed processed into just one particular form, and there are many other ways seaweed is used in Japanese cooking — in soup to obtain stock, for example, or stewing with a variety of vegetables and meat or seafood a slightly sweet soy-sauce based sauce.

As widely used as it is in Japanese cuisine, however, one thing you wouldn’t really expect from seaweed is for it to add “cuteness” to the food; they’re mostly dark green or brownish plants that grow in the sea, after all. Well, you might want to think again, because it turns out we’ve discovered a creative seaweed product that can add tons of cute and fun to your dish. Yes, it’s cat-shaped seaweed, and the best part is, you can get it delivered to your home each month in dried form!

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High school students’ parody of Japanese “Wonder Core” ab-cruncher commercial goes viral【Video】

We all need to make time for exercise, even hardworking students preparing for exams. But between the pressures of class, cram school, homework, and social obligations, it can be difficult to find the time to squeeze in a proper workout, particularly if you’re constantly finding yourself caught in the middle of your friends’ madcap schemes and practical jokes.

However, according to a recent parody of the infamous Wonder Core commercial, getting pranked again and again could well hold the secret to giving you a rock-hard set of abs. Who knew!

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Cat stealing your seat? Fold-flat chair foils feline invasions of your workspace

Cute as they can be, cats don’t really understand some of the finer points of reciprocating the courtesies their human housemates extend to them. For example, we’re willing to bet that no matter how much you love your pet, you probably don’t lay your head down in its cat bed for a nap when it’s not snoozing there or bypass a trip to the bathroom to just relieve yourself in its litterbox.

Cats, on the other hand, have no qualms about stealing your seat as soon as you get up, basking in the residual warmth from your hindquarters and leaving you with no place to sit when you come back to your desk to finish the project you were working on, email you were writing, or incredibly important RocketNews24 you were reading.

Here with a solution to this turf war is Japanese interior goods brand Bauhutte, which is now selling a reconfigurable chair that foils your kitty’s attempts to hop on when you’re not occupying it.

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Transform your fridge or washing machine into a giant Nintendo Game Boy with the power of magnets!

Alright gamers, how many of you remember playing one of those brick-like Nintendo Game Boys – the one with the tiny black-and-green screen on top that was nigh-on impossible to see without a 100-watt lamp or the sun directly overhead? Mobile technology may have come an awfully long way since Nintendo first released its classic handheld into the wild, there’s nothing that beats the fondness of revisiting moments from our childhood, and that little hunk of plastic was definitely one of them.

You may not be able to get your hands on one of those old systems now, but lo, nostalgia is nigh! For now, with some simple magnetic power, you can transform one of your everyday home appliances, like your fridge or washing machine, into a blast from the past with these giant Game Boy magnets!

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Inventor makes working RC model of Flaptter from Ghibli’s Castle in the Sky

Humans have always had a fascination with flying. From the legend of Icarus to da Vinci’s ornithopter designs, we have long tried to mimic birds in an attempt to get ourselves into the air, though it hasn’t always produced the best results. Perhaps one of the most famous ornithopter designs in recent memory is the Flaptter from Studio Ghibli’s Castle in the Sky. We have to admit, we’ve spent a fair share of our time day dreaming about swooping over baseball games in these flying machines, but we never thought we’d actually get to fly one. We may have been wrong!

This working RC Flaptter is just about the peak of our dreams. We just need someone to stick a 3-D camera on the front so we can fly it from a first person perspective and we’ll never have another Tanabata wish again!

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Starbucks Japan rolls out chestnut lattes and frappuccinos to get us in the mood for autumn

Okay, who else is already sick of summer? Bugs, humidity, sweat, and pongy passengers on public transportation. Bring on the autumn, with its fresh, crisp air, cosy and stylish fall fashion, and seasonal flavours like pumpkin, cinnamon, and hot roasted chestnuts!

Luckily, it seems that Starbucks in Japan is feeling us and has decided to give us a treat to really get us in the mood for autumn with their new range of chestnut flavour lattes and frappuccinos which are due to go on sale next month!

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South Korean beverage maker teases consumers with bottles they can literally undress

The beach is, for obvious reasons, one of the most popular leisure destinations during summer. There’s so much to enjoy at the beach during the hotter months: the sun, the sea breeze, the refreshing water… and of course it’s bikinis and guys with well-sculpted bods galore.

But this summer in South Korea, it’s not just the beach babes and hunks who are strutting around in their skimpy swimwear. Even the world-famous probiotic beverage Yakult is showing off its shapely body in a variety of swimsuits! Check out the designs after the break!

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Crowdfunding project seeks to create AI version of model Ai Shinozaki, gives her terrifying teeth

In Japan, models occupy a similar position to the one cherry blossoms do. While appreciative eyes across the country love to gaze upon them, that pleasure is fleeting. The flowers are notorious for the brief window between when their buds open and wither, and given the premium the Japanese modeling industry places on youth, gurabia idols (a class that covers women who pose in swimwear, lingerie, or other sexy outfits) don’t tend to have particularly long careers.

But you know what never gets older or ground down by the high-pressure showbiz life? Artificial intelligence constructs, which is there’s now a crowdfunding project to create an AI version of one popular Japanese model, and the preview video shows the prototype chatting, blinking, and showing its terrifying, terrifying teeth.

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Genius parents “trick” young children into not watching TV using clever kid logic

While television can be a useful way to distract children for a brief period of time, that usefulness can completely backfire on you when you can’t get them to stop watching TV. It gets especially hairy at night when you need them to go to sleep, but they are screaming bloody murder when you turn off Sesame Street.

Thankfully, a clever parent in Japan has an idea that distressed parents can try; just tell your little one to say, “Night night, Mr. TV.”

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Pufferfish or plane crashes? What causes more deaths in Japan?

Megadeth once said there are “99 ways to die” and while I’d hate to question their methodology in arriving at that conclusion, I’d wager that there are actually many more. Japan is no exception, of course. Despite the nation’s relatively low rate of violent crime there are plenty of natural disasters like earthquakes and volcanoes that can do us in. Giant hornets, cuisine that features plentiful raw meats, and poisonous fish are all parts of daily life in Japan as well.

But statistically speaking, just how dangerous are these things? Let’s find out with a morbidly fun game that we like to call “Which Causes More Deaths?”

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