Being a foreigner living in Japan for the first time is fun. Even the most mundane parts of everyday life feel so new and exciting, and you just want to tell everyone you know about how strange and different everything is — which is exactly what most of us do.

The folks at Pirates of Tokyo Bay, a bilingual improv comedy group active in Tokyo, have put together two hilariously accurate videos of the sh*t gaijin (foreigners) living in Japan are known to say (and not say), especially to each other.

First up is “Sh*t Gaijin Say”:

Boy am I glad to hear that I’m not the only who’s asked that second-to-last question before!

Aaand here’s the second, and arguably even more hilarious, video “Sh*t Gaijin NEVER Say”:

Did anyone else lose it at 0:57?

A lot of the lines might not make much sense if you’ve never spent at least a few months living in Japan, and lifers might scoff and claim they’ve never said half these things, but the videos do a pretty fine job at capturing the kind of things blurted out by those of us in between.

I for one admit that I still have no idea who Pocari is and why they’ve bottled his sweat, but sweet Jesus does it recharge those electrolytes. Just take it from Takeshi:

Source: YouTube

▼ For similar laughs, check out “Sh*t Japanese Girls Say” and more