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What d’you mean, you’ve never read any comic-form Pokémon slash fiction? Boy, are you in for a treat, as we delve into the dark, dark depths of the internet to bring you … some sexy Pokémon time from a Japanese online message board.

(Things are about to get NSFW, unless your boss happens to be an aficionado of cartoon monsters getting it on. I’m pretty sure mine is. You’ve been warned!)

Things started out softly-softly, when one Japanese net user made the simple request “Draw me a sexy Voltorb”. Another enthusiastic netizen jumps up to start off the fun, with these nice vanilla illustrations.

▼ “Choose me… choose me.. YOU CHOOSE ME.”

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▼ I think this is supposed to be sexy…?

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Netizens, however, were not satisfied. The next request comes.

▼ “Now put panties on it”.

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“It”? Oh yes, that brings us to today’s fact of the day: Voltorb is genderless. A genderless ball. Just sayin’. THIS Voltorb is female, though, apparently.

▼ Incidentally, Magnemite is saying “Right here, yeah baby?” in this next pic. But you probably didn’t need me to tell you that.

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Well, that escalated quickly. Thus begins a four-page comic shipping Voltorb, Magnemite, and…

▼ Voltorb: “Oh, Magnemite’s back home before me already. Honey, I’m home!!!”

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“Hmm… what’s that strange noise…?”

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▼ “I wonder what that weird rhythmic panting sound could be…”

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▼ *No translation required*

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(Ordinary) Japanese net users had plenty to say on the subject:

“What the…?”

“You crazy!”

“Keep messing about drawing silly pictures like this and you’ll be on your own forever.
…That’s not to say I didn’t like it though.”

“What is up with Japan, drawing crap like this in the middle of the day?”

“Oh yeah…. it’s summer vacation.”

“Who knew Magnemite was bi?!”

“Well, I for one am excited.”

“Oh god it just gets worse and worse.”

“What offends me the most is that you’re actually good at drawing.”

Yup. Some people really do have too much time on their hands…

Source and images: VIPPER Sokuhou