Christmas may have come and gone, but the fun doesn’t stop here at RocketNews24 – today we’d like to share with our readers a heartwarming tale of two lonely male internet writers who, facing a dateless Christmas Eve (a sad state of affairs indeed for any Japanese male), decided to strike back against societal norms and… book into a love hotel together

Read on as we explore an enchanting evening involving massage, saunas, and fundoshi (Japanese traditional loincloths) aplenty! Disclaimer: you must be 18 or over to view this potentially NSFW, kind of frightening post!

Last week, RocketNews24 Japanese correspondents Yuichiro Wasai (whom you might remember for his love of unusual, confectionary-based haircuts) and professional scammer troller  Go Hatori found themselves lacking in date options on Christmas Eve and decided to deal with it by having a bro-tastic evening at a discreet love hotel. Nauseated by the barrage of sickening PDAs being performed all over the streets by loved-up couples who actually have real lives outside of their computer screens (hiss!), our intrepid reporters decided to stick it to romantic convention and grab themselves a piece of the rabu-rabu action, all by themselves! After all, if you can’t find a ladyfriend to spend a romantic Christmas Eve with, you just have to improvise! Let’s see how they got on!

First things first, they had to pony up some dough for the room. But check out this vac-tube technology which carries your payment away, removing any need to lock eyes with a single member of hotel staff! Japan really is the land of the future! Although, as the guys pointed out, this little contraption isn’t exactly modern. In fact, it’s largely been replaced by actual payment machines, which also perform the same useful function of enabling patrons to pay for stuff without having to make eye-contact with the staff. Still, it looks cool and makes a great swooshing noise!

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Love hotels have a bit of a weird reputation in the west for being seedy, but in Japan, with often cramped accommodation and kids tending to live at home with their parents well into adulthood, they perform a vital social function. (Gotta go somewhere, right?) They’re also a lot less elaborate than you might expect – the crazy Hello Kitty S&M dungeon themed rooms are so rare as to have achieved urban myth status. These days, love hotels are pretty practical, but all offer bathing facilities and some even offer a few fun extras, as you can see below!

The hotel the guys chose this time had a slot machine in the room! By the way, did you notice our reporters’ rather fetching fundoshi? Perfect attire for a relaxing evening!

▼ Ordering a tasty meal from room service!

After dinner, it’s massage time! Luckily the room is equipped with all the, um… “tools” you could need!

“Having some manly fun together with a fellow bro is just the tonic!” claims Wasai-san. “Now I won’t feel depressed anymore when I see happy couples out walking hand-in-hand!”

The guys heartily recommend a little bro-on-bro massage time to relieve tension during the festive season.

▼ The face of a man without a care in the world!

The hotel also has a pretty swanky bathroom complete with sauna!

▼ Sure, it’s a little cramped, but just look at those grins!

Time for some shut-eye! The guys have survived another lonely Christmas.

“I can definitely recommend this to anyone who’s feeling lonely this time of year”, states Mr Wasai. “Don’t feel bad; next year just grab a bro and hit up the love hotel. You’ll be glad you did!”

If you’re thinking of having a boys’ night of your own at a love hotel next time you’re in Japan, remember to phone ahead as many establishments won’t let two friends of the same sex rent a room, even on Christmas. Bah Humbug!

Photos © RocketNews24
[ Read in Japanese ]