Anyone who’s worked in a store, restaurant, or pretty much anywhere in the service industry knows the joy of interacting with customers. And it’s not just your country that has crazy customers, it’s a fact of humanity that transcends culture and language, Japan included.
So with that we bring you the top 10 tweets made with a hashtag that’s recently been getting very popular with Japanese twitter users: #ActualCustomerComplaints. We’re not 100-percent sure how true the “actual” part is, but they’re all so hilarious and painfully familiar that you’ll be too busy laughing and commiserating to mind.
Without further ado here at the top 10 tweets with translations underneath. Enjoy!
#10: Dealing With Kids
小学生「さっき買ったニンテンドープリペイドカード使えないんですけど!」
— まなしな (@soundwave0628) April 19, 2015
僕「はあ」
小学生「登録できないから五千円返金してください!」
僕「あのな、そのカード会計しないと使えないよ」
小学生「えっ」
同僚「ちょっとこっち来てくれるかな」
小学生「」#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
Elementary School Student: “This Nintendo Prepaid Card I just bought isn’t working.”
Me: “Oh really?”
Student: “It says it’s not registered so give me back my 5,000 yen.”
Me: “You know you have to actually buy the card before it’s activated?”
Student: “…what?”
Me: “Why don’t you come with me for a second?”
▼ “Get a’ out of here kid, and a’ never come back!”
#9: Opposites Attract (A Two-For-One)
ゲーム販売店にて
— GUNP (@gunp_m) April 19, 2015
客「これ」
私「買取りですか、少々お待ち下さい」
客「いや返品なんだけど」
私「なにか問題がありました?」
客「もうクリアしたからお金返して欲しいんだけど」
ク リ ア し た か ら お 金 返 し て
#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
At a game shop
Customer: “Here.”
Me: “Do you want to trade this in for credit?”
Customer: “No I want to return it.”
Me: “Was there a problem with it?”
Customer: “No I beat it so I want my money back now.”
I BEAT IT SO I WANT MY MONEY BACK
その逆もあって
— GUNP (@gunp_m) April 19, 2015
客「あのすみません返品したいんですけど」
私「なにか問題がありました?」
客「難しすぎてクリア出来ないから返品したいんだけど」
ク リ ア 出 来 な い か ら お 金 返 し て
#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
And the opposite of the above:
Customer: “Excuse me I’d like to return this.”
Me: “Was there a problem with it?”
Customer: “It was too hard and I can’t beat it so I want to return it.”
I CAN’T BEAT IT SO I WANT MY MONEY BACK
▼ These two customers were clearly meant for each other.
#8: Newfangled Security Systems
客「おい何でこの雑誌ヒモ縛って見られなくしてあるんだよ、立ち読み出来ねえじゃねえか」
— しゅんみょ(手洗い推奨 (@syunmyo) April 20, 2015
僕「・・・」#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
Customer: “Hey why is this magazine bound up in string? I want to look through it.”
Me: “…”
This one might need a little context. In Japan people often stand and read books/magazines in stores, often reading through the whole thing, then put it back on the shelf and leave without paying. While this could be considered practically stealing in other countries, it’s mostly fine in Japan. Except when you want to break open something that clearly shouldn’t be broken open in order to do your free reading.
#7: Problems with Technology
ホームセンター勤務時
— 池原阿修羅 (@faylreaf) April 20, 2015
50代女性客「買った炊飯器で米炊いたら真っ黒焦げよ!」
店「どういった状況で使用したのか詳しくお願いします」
客「お米入れてスイッチ押しただけよ!」
店「お水入れましたか?」
客「え?お水入れるなんて知らないわよ!」#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
I was working at a hardware store when a woman in her fifties came up to me.
Her: “Whenever I put rice into the rice cooker I bought here it comes out burnt black.”
Me: “Can you tell me how you’re using it so we can figure out the problem?”
Her: “I just put the rice in and flip on the switch.”
Me: “Did you put water in?”
Her: “What? How was I supposed to know to do that?”
▼ “I also haven’t been getting nearly as many channels with this antenna hat as I thought I would!”
#6: Raining Karma
カップル「傘いらなくなったから返品お願い」
— リーケ (@makikuro7) April 20, 2015
俺「傘濡れていますし少し汚れもありますので返品は」
カップル「何か文句あんの?早くしろよ」
マネジ「わかりました返品ですね」
意味わからん思ってたら急に雨降りカップル全力疾走でどっかいった時は流石に笑った#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
Couple: “We don’t need this umbrella anymore so take it back.”
Me: “I’m sorry but it’s wet and dirty so I don’t think we’ll be able to.”
Couple: “What?! Get your manager.”
The manager gave in and took the umbrella back, which I didn’t understand at all. But then as soon as the couple stepped outside it started pouring and I saw them running away as fast as they could. Gotta laugh.
▼ Even cats know you can use an umbrella more than once. Sheesh.
#5: One Track Mind
https://twitter.com/Giga_Rush_Ship4/status/589962904255868928When I was working at a convenience store
Me: “Welcome.”
Customer: “Cigarettes.”
Me: “Which number do you want?”
Customer: “Cigarettes.”
Me: “What brand?”
Customer: “Cigarettes.”
Me: “If you’re just going to keep saying ‘cigarettes’ then I won’t know what you want ”
Customer: “What? You don’t even know what cigarettes are?”
▼ We can only assume this is the look the clerk gave the customer afterward.
#4: Store Secrets
https://twitter.com/cami_kanon/status/589963576120446976Customer: “When is this thing going to be out long enough to get a half-price sticker?”
Me: “I’m sorry but we’re not allowed to tell customers that.”
Customer: “But I want it for half price, so can you just put it on there for me?”
Me: “I can’t do that.”
Customer: “Well if it’s gone by the time I come back I’m blaming you!”
▼ You should also take off the sale tag/sticker, put it on another item, then ask the clerk if you can get the new item for the sale price with a chuckle. They love hearing that.
#3: They Are Kind of Similar
客『××が入って無かった!(店長対応省略)マクドナルドの本社に電話してやるからな!』
— 44 (@ClawLion) April 20, 2015
店長『え?!あ!いや、お客様…』
客『うるさい!言い訳は聞かん!』(帰っていく)
俺『マックも大変ですね』
店長『な』
※ロッテリア
#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
Customer: “I’m going to call McDonald’s headquarters over this!”
Manager: “What? Uh, please, wait a second-”
Customer: “Nope! I’m done!” (Customer leaves.)
Me: “Wow. McDonald’s is in trouble.”
Manager: “Yeah.”
I was working at [McDonald’s rival] Lotteria.
▼ I mean, L and M are right next to each other in the alphabet.
#2: Wait a Minute
客「パスポートは身分証明にならんのか?」
— ひーくん榛名ロジャー@マニアック辞典 (@Joseph_Joehstar) April 19, 2015
僕「パスポートでは申し訳ありませんがお受けできません。免許証などはお持ちでないですか?」
客「ないからパスポート出してるんやろが!はるばる車で着てんねんぞ!」
免 許 不 携 帯
#実際に言われたクレーム晒す
Customer: “Can I use my passport for an ID?”
Me: “I’m sorry but we don’t accept passports. Do you have your driver’s license?”
Customer: “No, that’s why I wanted to use my passport. I can’t believe I drove here all this way and you need my license!”
…he drove here all this way without his license.
▼ The only kind of car you should be operating without a license on you.
And the last #ActualCustomerComplaint is…
#1: L is for Linguistics
https://twitter.com/KU1TO/status/589919139835183104Customer: “Why is this espresso so small? Give me back my money!”
Me: “I’m sorry but this is the cup we use for all-”
Customer: “Whatever. Give me an L-presso instead then.”
Me: “…what?”
Customer: “Don’t you even understand the alphabet? You gave me an S-presso, S-size. I want an L-presso, L-size!”
▼ All we can say after reading this.
Oh the joys of customer interaction. Have you had some pleasant experiences with customers similar to the above? Let us know in the comments! We want to hear them so we can laugh and cry with joy knowing we’re not the only ones out there who’ve had to deal with them.
Source: Hamusoku
Featured/top image: Quotespictures.com
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