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Master Blaster

Writer / Translator

Master Blaster is the two-man translating team of Canada’s Steven Le Blanc and Japan’s Masami M, a pair who in addition to writing work are in English education and created the StudyNow app for Japanese students of English.

Together they have written somewhere around 1,500 articles for RocketNews24 covering such diverse topics as Chinese men selling sanitary napkins to each other and a Japanese guy dragging an ear of corn around the Tokyo train system. A few of these were actually good, but don’t take our word for it! Here’s what our beloved readers had to say:

“One isn't always in the mood for bold tastes. But when I'm in the mood for bold flavor I turn to you.”
“Stupid article. Who cares what the Japanese think it's cool. You don't call a monkey, "gorilla".”
“You know, this is about the most cogent explanation of how a turbocharger works that I have ever seen in the non-motorsports world.”
“Thanks for the article peter!”
“It's people like you who make exploitation possible.”
“It looks yummy and the story was great. Thank you for the smile.”

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Posted by Master Blaster (Page 122)

Enjoy a platter of Youkai Sashimi while we explain that cat’s name

As we’ve been constantly reminding you over the past year or so, Youkai Watch is really big in Japan now, and yet some of you out there still don’t seem to believe us. We’ve watched them rip the annual McDonald’s calendar endorsement deal out of the cuddly clutches of Pokemon. We’ve seen fans carve their graven images into pumpkins. We’ve tasted of their milk. Still, there are those who think that it’s just a flash in the pan.

For those people, we present the highest honor a character in Japan can receive: a sashimi platter in their likeness.

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2015 Chinese Dream Calendar comes true! 12 whole months of Xi Jinping and his wife waving

As with the beginning of any new year, there comes the chore of getting a new calendar for your wall or fridge. Sure one usually arrives in the mail from your friendly neighborhood real estate agency, or you could always shell out for the motif of your choosing from a local calendar boutique.

But the really lucky years are when the perfect calendar just falls right into your lap, as it did with our Japanese writer Ponkotsu the other day. From an associate in Shanghai, he received something in the mail with the words Chinese Dream printed on its front; a calendar that he knew in an instant would become the one of his own dreams too.

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Indian man still insists on driving backwards at full speed after eleven years

There’s a particular type of male who when in possession of a vehicle strives to make it the most outstanding machine on the road for better or for worse. This generally involves painting obnoxiously loud colors onto their cars, which have been fitted with even more obnoxiously loud speakers. The result is a visual and audible horror show only appreciated by those with a similar mindset.

And then we have Harpeet Devi of India who has reached new heights of annoying car customization. He had his transmission customized to have four speeds in reverse and only one speed forward so he can drive backwards everywhere he goes.

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We try Youkai Watch Pretz “our milk flavored” snacks, now with 6% milk!

Although they often live in the shadow of their cousin Pocky, Glico’s Pretz brand of cracker sticks are also usually quite tasty. They certainly have enough taste power to stand on their own, but now after joining forces with the children’s money magnet that is Youkai Watch they certainly are a snack force to be reckoned with. The result of this power coupling is Our Milk Flavored Youkai Watch Pretz.

The concept of youkai (traditional Japanese monsters) milk is kind of disgusting in the first place but fun for the kids so we’ll let that slide. However, one sharp-eyed Twitter user spotted in the fine print below: “milk solids 6 percent” leading many online to wonder if “our milk” might actually be something far more heinous. So, I grabbed a pack to take a gander at the actual ingredients and find out if Our Milk Flavored Youkai Watch Pretz actually taste like milk – youkai or otherwise – despite apparently hardly having any milk inside.

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Japan’s hydrogen fuel cell stations begin to open, but are they worth the switch?

With Toyota’s first hydrogen fuel cell vehicle (FCV), Mirai, now available, many wait to see if this revolutionary car with take off or fall flat in Japan. On 25 December, JX Nippon Oil & Energy began selling hydrogen for these new vehicles at a cost of 1,000 yen per kilogram (US$8/kg – $3.60/lb).

So is that worth giving up the pumps for…whatever hydrogen comes out of?

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Lotteria’s lucky bag opened: even if you’re not a Naruto fan you’ll come out ahead!

As you’ve probably already gathered by browsing our front page today, fukubukuro season again! And for the 99.999999999 percent of us who couldn’t get the robot suit, every other store in Japan has something up for grabs.

This time we’re going to take a peek inside a lucky bag from leading fast food chain Lotteria as purchased by our own Hattori GO. Even though he’s not particularly a Naruto fan, he found himself very satisfied with his 2,000-yen (US$17) paper bag, so let’s take a look inside and see why!

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Kyoto taxi drivers reduce convenience store robberies by 50 percent by doing absolutely nothing

Throughout 2014, Kyoto Prefectural Police began an initiative having taxi drivers and late-night convenience stores work together to reduce incidents of armed robbery. Although still early, the program has so far been rousing success, leading to a 48 percent decrease in convenience store robberies compared to the previous year. They also get extra points for giving it the cool name of “Midnight Defender Strategy”.

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Japan Ministry of Defense develops tiny, grenade-shaped remote surveillance robot

The Japanese Ministry of Defense’s Technical Research & Development Institute (TRDI) appears to be nearing completion of the Throwable Type Reconnaissance Robot. It’s a little black orb about 50 percent bigger than a softball that Self-Defense Force members can simply toss into environments otherwise hazardous to humans and have a look around before taking action. It looks kind of awesome.

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Ring in the new year with a real robot suit, on sale at Keisei Department store

The New Year season is often a peak shopping time in Japan, and as such stores pull out the big guns in what are known as fukubukuro (lucky bags). These are bags full of the merchandise a particular shop peddles. Sometimes it’s random which means you could end up with a laptop for fifty bucks, other times the contents are known but you can still get a decent deal on a bulk purchase. And sometimes, in the name of publicity, shops will throw in some unusual item or offer remarkably great deals to celebrate the new year.

It appears the winner for 2015 will be Keisei Department Store who are offering what must be a very large fukubukuro containing a two-meter-tall functional robot suit!

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The International Federation of Sports Onigokko hopes for tag to be a part of the Tokyo Olympics

No matter what culture you come from, you have probably played a game of tag or a similar game by a different name at least once in your life. It’s a childhood pastime that quite possibly dates well back into prehistoric times in one form or another.

In Japan it is well-loved and goes by the name onigokko (“play demon”) wherein on player takes the role of the oni (demon/”it”) and tries to touch the other players which will turn them into oni.

I say “well-loved” because in recent years the country has held the largest games of tag in the world and has currently evolved the game into “sports onigokko” an organized team-based version of the of what you may know as tag.

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Shohei Otomo brings the gritty side of Japan to vivid life with a mere ballpoint pen

Shohei Otomo can sometimes be found simply under the working name “Shohei.” That might possibly have been an effort to downplay his heritage, because when your father is responsible for some of the most influential manga and anime ever it can be hard to get looked at as an individual.

However, outside of a certain degree of edginess and high degree of Akira and Domu, creator Katsuhiro Otomo and his son each stand alone with their respective arts. Shohei has the unique gift of creating a provocative illustration using only a ballpoint with such a level of detail and texture that you can get lost in them.

He’s posted a series of time-lapse YouTube videos showing him at his craft which is a spectacle almost as impressive as the drawings themselves.

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Around the world in 22 upside-down houses 【Photos】

Especially during this hectic holiday season it sure would be nice to get away from it all. Everyone needs a chance to refresh and get a new perspective on things. And what better way to get a new perspective than to visit an upside down house?

You might be thinking “What, are you high? There are no upside down houses where I live.” Well, you might be right about the high part, but couldn’t be further from the truth when it comes to upside down houses because they can be found all over the world it seems. Here is just a small sampling of these dizzying monuments, perhaps one of them is in your very own backyard – or over it.

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Truck driver hailed as “hero” for cutting off car on wet highway

There is perhaps no greater feeling of anger and frustration than getting cut off on an expressway. To have your pleasant cruising speed shattered by some jerk-off who can’t tilt their head an extra inch or position their mirrors properly is usually an unforgivable act in the driving world.

However, this one truck driver in particular has earned the acclaim of everyone who watched the harrowing video of it cutting off a car as they both drove along at high speeds on a rainy highway. After watching the video we’re pretty sure you’ll understand why.

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Self-healing glasses on sale next year

Starting on 1 January, 2015 Vision Megane will begin selling their strongest frames to date. Dubbed the Super Taflex, it boasts extreme resistance to bending and stretching and also claims to be able to heal itself from everyday dents and scratches within ten seconds.

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Fox Japan to release ultimate edition of Commando, announced in series of possibly drunken tweets

People look to Japan for many reasons, from the rich heritage of samurai or tea ceremonies to pop culture phenomenons such as anime. But the one thing I truly love about Japan is its people’s taste in film.

Classics such as Die Hard and Robocop are widely accepted as the cinematic gold they are, and now Arnold Schwarzenegger’s greatest rocket launcher-wielding performance in Commando is getting the royal treatment by 20th Century Fox Japan in honor of the 30th anniversary of its release here. Far from a simple added commentary track, this special release is chock-full of exclusive features befitting a monumental specimen of the art from such as this.

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We head to the Snickers Hungry Barber for a free haircut, worth every penny

The other day we reported that the people behind chocolate, peanut and nougaty munch-fest Snickers was opening up a barber shop in Tokyo’s trendy Omotesando. Dubbed the Snickers Hungry Barber, the shop boasts some of the strangest hairstyles in the world, and they’re all free of charge!

Our Japanese correspondent Yuichiro Wasai decided to take Snickers up on the offer and ordered an Omakase (“I’ll leave it to you”) from the shop’s scissor-wielding staff. Little did he know that he would receive a hair style so potent with animal magnetism that everyone he passed on the street seemed to want a photo of him.

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Station in China reminds us to kindly “wait outside a noodle”

In an effort to make facilities foreigner-friendly or simply to enhance the style of an advertisement Asian governments and businesses will often add English translations. However, many don’t feel it’s worth the effort to do a proper translation and simply rely on automatic ones. The results are often sure to put a smile on the face of English speakers in the rest of the world.

Now, Xi’an North Station has put another feather in the cap of gloriously wrong translations…and this time they called it macaroni.

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Sony to co-produce door locks which can be opened entirely by smartphone

The list of things you can’t do with a smartphone grows smaller and smaller as time marches on, and one more thing to cross off that list is coming in May next year. A new device is scheduled to hit the market which will allow you to open your front door using your mobile device and a special app. Called Qrio Smart Lock, its crowdfunding page boasts that you can “protect your privacy with Sony security technology.”

…Yeah. The Qrio Smart Lock will sell for 10,500 yen (US$90) and if the buzz online is any indication, people couldn’t be more terrified at its arrival.

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Character images of new Digimon Adventure series released, expected to air in spring 2015

At an event marking the 15th anniversary of the original Digimon Adventure series in Odaiba, Tokyo on 1 August, an announcement was made declaring a brand new chapter in the human-monster buddy saga will bring back the original characters.

Along with the announcement came a special anniversary website with some Digi-Eggs containing details of the new series. However, no matter how much you rubbed those suckers nothing came out – until now.

The hatchling information included a brief rundown of the staff and a first look at all eight of the DigiDestined more evolved…I mean grown up.

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“Tax” declared the official kanji of 2014

They say a picture’s worth a thousand words, but in Japan every year people try to distill an entire year’s worth of words into a single picture…or logograph if you want to get technical about it.

Last year, after tens of thousands of votes were counted, 輪 pronounced rin or wa and meaning “ring” was selected to represent the nations various achievements of 2013 such as winning the bid for the Olympic games and having Mt. Fuji designated as a World Heritage Site.

And today, after the Buddhist monk approached the canvas of Kiyomizu Temple in Kyoto, this kanji above is what he painted under a fittingly gloomy and cloud-filled sky.

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