Let’s say you love looking at the moon. You’re enchanted by its beautifully full and round shape, and sometimes you find it so enticing you’d like to reach out and touch it (with its permission, of course).
But all that ardent admiration still doesn’t mean you actually know anything about the moon, does it?
That’s not too far from the relationship some men have with women’s breasts, according to this list of 11 things Japanese women wish more men understood about their chests.
Internet portal My Navi Woman recently polled its female users, asking them for their suggestions for a collection of things guys just don’t get about women’s breasts. Here are the top 11 responses.
10 (tie). Small breasts make bras look cuter (14.4 percent of respondents)
We’re not sure if this is supposed to be because of the propensity for a large bust to steal the spotlight, but at least some fashion designers seem to agree with this sentiment.
10 (tie). I’m not happy when guys other than my boyfriend compliment my chest (14.4 percent)
Bonus tip: Her boyfriend probably doesn’t appreciate the compliment either
Bonus tip #2: Even if you’re going steady with a girl, it’s probably a smart idea to mix up your sweet talk beyond “Killer rack, babe.”
9. Having my breasts touched doesn’t really turn me on (14.8 percent)
Individual preferences will vary, but remember, guys: No matter how much you’re enjoying your trip to Mammaryland, it’s considerate to make time for a round of Lady’s Choice, too.
8. Bra size and sex drive aren’t related (15.2 percent)
If the chest is, in fact, not your ultimate intended female body destination, maybe it’s best not to get too hung up on cup size.
7. Even women with large breasts can lack confidence in their chest (15.6 percent)
Breasts have a magnetic pull on men’s eyeballs, but having too many people staring at you can sometimes make you second-guess whether or not they all like what they see.
6. Even when it’s just us girls around, we hardly ever show our breasts to each other (16.5 percent)
For those of you who refuse to give up on the fantasy, we guess you can take some shred of solace in that “hardly ever” qualifier.
5. If a woman has natural breasts, when she lies down, they’ll look a lot smaller (25.1 percent)
Really, if the woman you’re with has already decided to take off her top and stretch out on a flat surface, maybe it’s time to just be happy for what you’ve got.
4. My nipples can get hard for reasons other than because I’m turned on (26.3 percent)
Sometimes, those prominent points aren’t because she’s ready to peel her clothes off, but because she’d actually like to put on another layer to ward off the cold.
2 (tie). Just massaging breasts doesn’t make them that much bigger (30 percent)
A lot of people would argue you could make that statement more truthful by removing “that much.” It’s not hard to see why this legend persists so strongly in some guys’ minds, though. Men like touching breasts, so wouldn’t it be wonderful if the act itself gave them more to touch? Unfortunately, that’s about as likely to happen as refilling the keg by draining your beer mug.
2 (tie). Even women can get hair on their chest (30 percent)
Not to the same extent as a guy, but yes, sometimes women get strands of pectoral body hair, and one or two might slip past their grooming ritual. Also, girls occasionally fart. Figure out a way to make peace with those revelations.
1. You can’t really have cleavage if you’re not wearing a bra (30.4 percent)
We’re tempted to point the finger at anime for this misconception. Anime gravity doesn’t always work like real gravity. Characters can leap dozens of feet into the air. Long hair stays spiked even when doused in rain or sweat. Breasts remain impossibly perky and photogenically smooshed together even when they’re not stuffed into a supportive bra.